Scumbag Women!

A casual acquaintance posted this link on Facebook, accompanied by how he’s not sexist, but “a lot of this is so true”:

http://www.damnlol.com/scumbag-women-21283.html

Let’s address these one by one!

1) Hitting people!  Solution: BOTH OF THOSE PEOPLE ARE ASSHOLES.  I agree that there is an unfortunate misconception that it’s okay for girls to hit guys.  I myself am occasionally guilty of supporting this.  Not supporting actual violence, but supporting the idea that some people deserve to be punched.  And lots of people of both genders see girls hitting guys as this cute little way girls show affection because they can’t actually do any harm.  So, yes, I see what you’re saying, and I agree this is a problem, but I don’t see this as “Scumbag Women” so much as “Wow, society has got to change.”  Which I think is true with most of this.

2) Surprise kisses!  I actually think that lots of girls would / do love being surprise kissed by a boy.  I think the issue here is consent.  You have to be surprise kissing someone who WANTS to be surprise kissed by you.  This is obviously difficult.  I believe that you can get consent through body language, but it’s also possible to misread said body language.  So it’s easier for everyone if you just nix the surprise and ask.  I mean, look at the picture sequence provided with the “boy surprise kissing a girl” set.  That woman is so clearly not into that!  How is this about women being jerks and not about that guy clearly being an asshole?  To sum it up: I think both genders can pull this off and both genders can fuck this up and it’s really better to just talk to your partner than try to pull this shit.

3) Girls/boys in the wrong bathroom.  Solution: unisex bathrooms.  Seriously, I don’t understand gendered bathrooms.  I don’t understand the supposed “threat” of males in female bathrooms.  I don’t know if a lot of men want to watch women use the bathrooms?  I don’t think that’s supposed to be sexy.

4) Helping people carry stuff.  Yeah, if anyone calls you a “fucking pussy” for being unable to lift a heavy box, STOP HANGING OUT WITH THAT PERSON.  And if anyone tells you that they should help you carry something “’cause you’re a girl,” without you having asked for help, stop hanging out with that person, too.  Both of these people are sexist.  This one makes me really mad.  Like being unable to lift a box is going to turn your genitalia from male to female or some shit.  I don’t even know.

5) Looking at the other sex’s body.  I…don’t know.  I don’t think a lot of girls look at guys’ penises a lot.  Especially not as a seduction tactic.  Is that a thing?  Does it work?  And, look: when I wear clothes that make my boobs especially visible, I am okay with people looking at them.  I understand that that’s not true for everyone.  But there is a difference between “looking” and “staring.”  It’s natural to look at and notice someone’s body.  Staring at any part of anyone’s body, though, is weird.  Go out and try staring at some random person’s ear.  It’ll creep them out.  It’s creepy.

6) Splitting the bill.  I think part of the difference here is that in the first case, the guy reaches for the bill and the girl offers to split it, and in the second one, the girl expects the guy to pay for everything and he suggests splitting the bill.  And I agree that any girl who uses that as an excuse to never see a guy again is kind of focusing on the wrong things.  Personally, it would make me uncomfortable if a guy insisted on paying for my meal.  But again, I don’t think the guy in the second scenario is dating the same girl as the first guy.

7) Crotch/boob grabbing.  Is the first scenario actually a thing that happens?  If it is, that is terrible.  That should not be a thing that happens.  But that doesn’t mean that the dude from the second scenario doesn’t deserve to be listed as a sex offender.  Both the woman from the first thing and the man from the second thing deserve to be prosecuted.  And I really dislike the way they’re using language here to make the woman seem intentionally manipulative in both these scenarios.

8) Masturbation.  Again, those are two very different girls.  No girl who masturbates is going to call you a “disgusting pervert” for masturbating.  I agree that masturbation should be de-stigmatized.  But again, I think this one is more about society’s perception of masturbation, especially female masturbation.  If it was more okay for girls to masturbate, more girls would do it, and fewer girls would expect guys not to do it.  This is a problem.  You’re right, Mr. Internet Dude.  But I fail to see how this is girls being “scumbags.”  These girls don’t get to masturbate because they think only perverts do, and you’re mad at THEM?  They think it’s not okay for them to masturbate!  Think how much it’d suck to feel that way!

9) Gamers.  Plenty of male gamers get laid.  And I’m sure plenty of female gamers don’t.  Shut up.

THERE WE GO.  WOMEN ARE TERRIBLE.  THANK YOU FOR ADDRESSING THIS IMPORTANT TOPIC, INTERNET.

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